Set goals for the perfect love – the effect of common plans and projects
How concrete goals and regular Relationship Goals work can promote a partnership – who wants to go through “thick and thin” together, must also leave room for the other Love is often a bit strange. Many people assume that certain things can not be applied to a romantic connection.
A relationship is just as it is: either good, a bit bumpy or barely enduring. But the truth could not be further. Because just as you can not just be good or bad at school or in a job, but you can definitely determine those attributes yourself through good organization, will and goals, so you can do that in your heart’s affairs. Setting goals in the relationship is a crucial factor. Find out about the impact of common plans and projects in the partnership.
What do you want to achieve in a relationship?
1. Summarize wishes and suggestions in a list
The first step to the perfect relationship leads you to a piece of paper. Write down all that is important to you in a relationship. Be specific and avoid general statements such as “being happy with my partner”. Instead, note:
“Acceptance of the hobbies from the partner.”
“Cuddle hour at least four times a week.”
“Joint ventures one weekend a month.”
“Cooking together two days a week.”
Then go through the list and honestly ask yourself if you fulfill all these points yourself. If not, try to find the reason.
Then eliminate any points that are already satisfying in your relationship to the satisfaction of both parties (for example, the regular Sunday breakfast together). All the points left on your list are the goals you want to achieve in your relationship.
2. Make your wishes tangible
Just knowing what you want, but not putting the whole thing in a timely manner is not very helpful. Limit the time to reach your relationship goals clear.
Instead of saying that you want to have a serious relationship with your current crush by autumn, plan to speak to her about a shared flat by 15 September. For singles, however, one goal could be: “Have at least eight rendezvous by May 30”.
3. The solution lies in the future – think backwards
Imagine how everything will be when you have achieved all of your relationship goals. From this vision, outline step by step a plan of how to achieve this in reality. So you think backwards.
Let’s say you want to lead a more active lifestyle as a couple. Then maybe imagine how you go to a gym with your better half several times a week, cook healthy together and instead of sitting in front of the TV in the evenings, go dancing or meet up with friends to bowl. So that’s your goal.
Based on this, you must now set individual milestones. If you end up going to a gym several times a week, you’ll need to start with a beginner’s plan that will make you and your sweetheart fit. At the beginning, you may only go to the studio twice a week, but the beginning is done.
You have to do the same reasoning while cooking. To cook healthy together, you must read. For this books have to be bought or researched on the internet.
Setting goals is not an act of shyness and timidity. Be calm and aim high, even if you are not sure how to do it.
Once the goal is set, there will already be a way to achieve it, because any goal of any size can be broken down to smaller intermediate goals, thus losing its terror. Put it on!
CLEAR SEPARATION OF WORK AND PRIVATE LIFE IN A PARTNERSHIP
It is not always easy to separate one’s private life from work, especially when couples work together in a company. If the job is not perceived as a burden, but as a common task, a livelihood is possible. However, those who take work topics home with them and always want to address them, quickly violate the boundaries of the other. Private life suffers from problems in the world of work, so clear agreements should be made as to whether and when to talk about work at home.
Psychologists and sociologists at the University of Dresden warn of problems that threaten not only private life, but also economic existence. If a couple heads a company together, they may face insolvency after the breakup. In this case it is recommended to discuss all eventualities in advance and to consolidate them by contract.
It is often the case that the partner – or you yourself – lets yourself go a little in the course of the relationship – here too you can fight against each other …
Help, my husband lets himself go!
What were those times when the partner advertised for one! Chic, charming and very hard-working, the relationship began to end often after a relatively short time with a junky tracksuit on the sofa, unshaven and sitting with the remote control or the computer mouse in his hand. According to a survey, in Germany every fifth woman moans about the fact that the former great guy has turned into a couchpotato.
When the dream prince becomes a nightmare
Interested? Active? Groomed? Nonsense – and that in the face of such conditions, the relationship changes to the negative, is hardly surprising. Here are a few tips that may be able to reroute the rudder of the sinking relationship ship.
But a warning in advance: There are incorrigible male copies that are immune to any change and then only helps to search the proverbial vastness. However, one should not throw in the towel right away, because many men want to maintain their relationship and take the one or other clear words but very much to heart.
1. Search the conversation
Do not talk reproachfully and aggressively, but with female rhetorical skill and perceptiveness. Popping the hero of yore Relationship Goals that he has become sloppy and disgusting will only make him stubborn and call out the adage “Then look for another”.